Bully by J.K. Durick

It’s a matter of what we remember

And when we remember it –

The dents and dings of childhood

 

Now distant, still have a life,

Shadows, figures we see out of

The corner of our eye.

 

Fearsome power we know early,

Learn somehow to get on

With less of us left over.

 

Inevitable, inescapable – 

We weather the silence and

The complicity of friends.

 

After many years, I still feel it

The trap closing on me –

It was my fault for being

 

Too large, too awkward, always

Dressed wrong, afraid to fight,

Afraid of anger.

 

Embarrassing memories remain

With us – large and awkward.

I can still see his face, his fists.

 

I can still hear what he said and

His laughter, their laughter –

And it still frightens me.

J. K. Durick is a writing teacher at the Community College of Vermont and an online writing tutor. His recent poems have appeared in Shot Glass Journal, Black Mirror, Third Wednesday, Thrush Poetry Journal, and Leaves of Ink.